This month continues to be a “fire hose to the face” kind of month. I’m reminded of the cute illusion that plans and expectations are such a silly notion and have adopted the term “aspirations” rather than plans.
We’ve been tested again. Our sweet Sammy—our bionic dog—needed yet another surgery after falling off our boat and tearing her Achilles tendon. Without a prosthetic repair, she wouldn’t be able to use her back leg at all. So, we’re back in the trenches: six more weeks of cast care, two more weeks of the cone, another stitch removal, and months of crate rest and carrying her from place to place. It’s exhausting, and it’s heartbreaking. It’s hard to believe she’s not mad at us for our part in her accident, yet she remains one of our greatest teachers. She knows we love her and will always do our best to help her through. We can learn a lot about trust and forgiveness from our pets.
And just as we were hoping for more the pressure and responsibility to relent, we learned that my mom has another restricted vein that’s preventing her new liver from doing its job fully. She’s now dealing with weekly fluid drainage until a procedure can clear the blockage. She just hit her four-month post-transplant milestone—when she was supposed to be gaining more freedom. And so were Patrick and I who are her primary caretakers. Another pivot is now required.
This season has taught us another important lesson. We can’t do it all and it’s ok to ask for help. This is not an easy notion for either of us who both demonstrate the overly independent adaptation “I can do it I don’t need help.” Being pulled in so many directions simply has required even more surrender from both of us. Again, another lesson reminder.
We’re doing our best to persevere. To lean into the wisdom of the Stoics, who remind us that life has always been hard. That control is an illusion. That peace comes not from managing every outcome, but from how we respond to what happens.
Socrates lived through a 27-year war. Zeno survived a shipwreck and political upheaval. Seneca endured Nero and watched Rome burn. Marcus Aurelius faced floods, famines, and wars. The Stoics didn’t escape hardship—they endured it. They rose above it. And they taught us that we don’t control what happens, only how we live through it.
So, this month, I invite you to join me in continuing to practice presence, flexibility, and adaptability in the face of life’s challenges. I know you are likely dealing with many unexpected twists and turns as well and you’re not alone!
Much Love,
Kelly
Check out my latest article: What 'Trauma-Informed' Really Means in the Context of EMDR Therapy.
Ever been told to “calm down” or “just let it go” when you’re angry?
Anger is one of the most misunderstood emotions—and one of the most important to express in a healthy way.
In this episode of Adaptable, I’m exploring why anger isn’t something to fear or suppress, but a signal worth listening to. We’ll talk about how unexpressed anger can quietly turn into resentment, anxiety, or even physical symptoms, and how learning to channel it can lead to greater clarity, stronger boundaries, and more authentic relationships.
We’ll tackle the misconceptions (“If I express anger, people will think I’m out of control”), the tricky moments (“What do I do when I’m furious but still need to be productive?”), and the empowering shifts that come when you give yourself permission to feel and communicate what’s really going on beneath the surface.
I’ll share practical tools for identifying the root cause of your anger, expressing it without damaging relationships, and using it as a force for positive change. You’ll also learn how to recognize when anger is protecting your values, and how to navigate the tension between speaking your truth and keeping conversations constructive.
If you’ve ever wondered whether it’s possible to be both assertive and compassionate—or if you’re simply ready to stop bottling up your feelings—this episode will change the way you see anger forever.
Your anger has a purpose.
Let’s learn how to honor it.
Listen below!
